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Friday, January 28, 2011

My days
8:30 AM Sometimes late at night, as I lay quietly in my bed, I hear the screams of unfamiliar women outside. I try to put myself in their shoes and picture what they might be going through… it is impossible. Maybe they are running from their husbands who want to “show them who’s boss”, or they are wailing over a loved one who just passed away. It is difficult to hear those sounds at night when my life doesn’t compare in them in the slightest.
I apologize for the absence of blog posts lately. It has been a busy holiday, and a lot has happened. I keep telling myself “Elissa, you need to keep writing your experiences or you will forget everything!” Again, I’m not really sure where I left off. This New Years was the first time I actually slept before midnight. I got woken up abruptly by two phone calls from America wishing me a Happy New Year, which made my week?. After new years, it was a countdown until my mother and Diane’s arrival. Some days went horrendously slow, and other days I had no time to think about their arrival. Finally, the day came when I got to hop in the car and go see them. It was a fantastically wonderful reunion. There were, of course, tears and smiles as I looked into my mothers and I looked into each other’s eyes. Before I came to Cameroon, my family and I had talked about the possibility that I wouldn’t see them for 9 months. We decided that for me to have my own experience, it would be best for us to stay apart for those months. Well, my mother did not take that too seriously especially after 4 months of not seeing me. I am glad that she took the opportunity to come and see me as well. Not only was it nice to see her beautiful face, but also I was running out of American supplies?
While my mother and Diane were here, I tried with all of my strength to show them the full experience I was having here in Africa. You can imagine how difficult it is to fit a whole 4 months of experience in 4 days. Thankfully, Koza is not a big place, and we had time to share everything by the time they left. I can’t even tell you everything that happened in those 4 days without writing pages and pages, but I can tell you that God blessed much! He has, through my mother and Diane, giving many gifts of love and comfort to these people. I will hear about them in Koza probably until I leave.
After the short four days that they were here in Koza, we traveled to WAZA where we would spend the remainder of our time. It was a “safari” type of place, but when I say that, don’t expect that we were in paradise. It took us almost a whole day and a half to know that they even had running water to take a shower. It was the cheap version of a safari, but it was a great experience. We saw giraffes, elephants, and many other beautiful animals. It was pretty intense.

2:15 PM Continued… I couldn’t finish my blog because I had to get to work. My goodness was today a good experience. Yesterday I went to work, but I was very sick because I had to travel for 9 hours from WAZA to Koza, but today I was strong. I went to Maternity because I heard that there was a delivery. There are two girls from South Cameroon who only speak English, so I can communicate with them very well. I asked them if they were going to perform the delivery and they nodded. It was going to be there second time only. Since I am always interested in deliveries, I stayed close by. As we were watching for the head to come out, we all noticed that the head was too big. Ganava had to do an episiotomy. So as the woman was pushing with all of her might, he cut a little slit in her vagina so the baby’s head would come out, thus causing the suffering of the baby to end quickly. Yes, we used Lidocaine so the mother wouldn’t feel pain during the process. The baby was not breathing or crying very well, so I quickly escorted the two girls to help me give oxygen. We also kept patting the baby’s back so he would start crying. By the grace of God, he started to cry? I love it when that happens…
What I didn’t realize was that I would be put in Ganava’s place for the next women who walked in. It got a little crazy because there were two women in the OR who needed to have help. Since Ganava was busy with the women prior, he asked me to help with the other woman who was delivering. I quickly realized that I was going to be the teacher of a delivery. Just like the delivery before, this woman needed an episiotomy. As she pushed and pushed with no result, I asked Ganava if I could do the episiotomy. I had seen it many times, but I had never done it myself. He told me to go for it. I quickly got 5 cc’s of Lidocaine in a syringe, numbed her vagina well, and cut a slit so the baby’s head could come out perfectly. The same time I was doing the episiotomy, I was teaching the Limbe girl how to receive the baby. I am not very good a multitasking, but the Lord helped me to accomplish everything well. At the end of the two pregnancies, I looked at the two women and the two healthy babies with joy. The Lord provided for me and the people in the OR. I can now say I am ready to teach people how to deliver babies (in Africa)!

9:00 PM continued… I came home from visiting the surrounding villages and after choir practice this night. I found a woman staying outside my house with Pierre my guard at night. He said that it was Isaiah my housekeeper’s wife. I quickly invited her inside to eat my daily dinner with Pierre. Pierre continued to tell me why she was staying at the house. Her 20-year-old daughter had just passed away of who knows what, and she was traveling to see family. She was going to stay in this horrible smelling room that is compared to the garage or worse in America. She was going to sleep on the cement floor. I told Pierre I couldn’t handle that so I made a bed for her in another room. When she came in a saw, she almost fell over with excitement. I do not have to do a lot to show God’s grace on these people. She will only stay here one night, but I am glad I got to do something for her as encouragement. May God be with the family during this hard time.

It has been a privilege to learn the things I have been learning in the hospital. I have experienced a lot of good things and a lot of bad things, but I know that in each experience I go through, the Lord is teaching me to be more Christ-like and helping me to grow in the image of his character. I am in the stage of my life here where somewhat all of the “first visit” excitement is wearing out, and I am truly a resident. Sometimes I feel like the day when I will come back to America is so far away, and yet I feel that if I left here, I would feel the same pain. Just as I have been talking to my mother when she was here, Africa is definitely a calling for me. I’m content with where he has brought me, not because it is easy in any sense of the word. It is because I feel the Holy Spirit moving in this place. I cannot say how appreciative I am of the support of prayer from America. Keep it up!
Posted by Elissa

Monday, December 27, 2010
My Revelation
Today I came home from the hospital at noon. I just couldn’t keep working. From practicing everyday with the choir, spending the night at Zara’s house for Christmas (staying up late, waking up early), to working at the hospital everyday 6 days a week. I was just exhausted. I have had many experiences these last few days that I feel are God’s divine appointments. I have talked to many people who have told me they can open their heart up to me. I feel like God is beginning to reveal why I am here. I came to this hospital thinking that I could be an influence to the patients only (by God’s grace I will be as well), but I don’t think God brought me here for other reasons. Not for those who are necessarily “weak”…physically, but those who are week mentally and spiritually.
Since I have been here, there have been times when I have been weak physically, mentally, and spiritually. When I first arrive, as I might have told you before, I was adamant about staying away from Malaria. Even my family will tell you that I prayed God would protect me. I thought it was going to be this great miracle! “Elissa went to Africa in the most malaria-infested country and came back without a single mosquito bite!” hooray!! The Lord humbles me all the time, and this was one of the times. I know some of you might think this is a ridiculous thought but, since the Lord as humbled me from that experience, and I have had malaria twice, I am now able to relate to the patients who walk into the hospital… almost every single one of them! I know that these diseases are dangerous, and I am still motivated to keep as healthy as possible, but if God brought me here, there is a reason why he puts me through these situations. I am living my life for Jesus Christ! What more do I need? Like it says in 2 Cor 12:10 “Therefore I am CONTENT with weakness, with insults, with troubles, with persecutions and difficulties for the sake of Christ, for whenever I am weak, then I am strong!” Now when persecution comes along, does this verse become invalid? NO! Quite the opposite actually… it is made alive in me! The words have sunk deep into my soul and every morning when I wake up, I relate to these words. I have been physically ill since I’ve been in Africa, but why would God bring me here to this place if he didn’t have a purpose for me? I’m weak, but God is made strong. I go through persecution knowing that God has gone through more. If I am living this life for Him, then there is nothing that I need to fear, for he is my provider.
Mentally, each day can become challenging. The only thing I wanted to do today was come home and shut my door to the world and be alone. Thankfully I got a few hours to myself (much needed). After I practiced with the choir and came home again, I just wanted to go to sleep. It was about 6 o clock. I laid down for a little bit, and realized I hadn’t eaten. Just a little bit ago, I got up and went to the kitchen. I was afraid to turn on my light for fear someone would see that I was home?. After turning on the light, I stood there for a few moments, listening for anyone outside. Finally, I relaxed… “Eliza!!!” I was startled by Pierre’s voice outside. I had forgotten that Pierre comes to my house every night and sleeps outside to watch over me. Since Pierre has been here, Caitlin and I have taken up the job of feeding him every night. We would always ask him when he came in, “when was the last time you ate?” he would tell us it was that morning. Caitlin never liked his answer and would stuff his face most every night. Now that she is gone, it is my responsibility to remember him and his needs. She even put a sign up that says, “feed Pierre”. I see it everyday ?! I realized after hearing his voice outside, that I have an obligation. An obligation to be mentally alert for those who are in need. I feel that God will give me strength in this situation as well. “Instead of being motivated by selfish ambition or vanity, each of you should, in HUMILITY, be moved to treat one another as more important than yourself. Each of you should be concerned not only about your own interests, but about the interests of others as well.” Phil 2:3,4. Because of the fact that I was so mentally exhausted, I didn’t want to feed Pierre, but God spoke to me tonight about true humility. Being a servant even when you are totally and completely mentally exhausted yourself. He gives you strength to go a little bit further when you feel like you are going to crash… and a little bit further, and a little bit further. I have realized that nothing in my life has not been overcome. Always… when I feel like I can’t go on anymore, my heavenly father steps in once again.
My spirituality has been faltering. I can hear you saying… “How can that be when you are serving the Lord in Africa? You have to lean on the Lord for everything in those kinds of places. That is what the experience is all about?” Well, to be quite honest with you, I haven’t had personal devotions for a while. The Lord has allowed me to slip away from the most important thing in my life so that I could try and see if I can be strong without him. Not only that, but I have tried to be spiritual without him. I honestly think that is why I am so exhausted today. I have tried to be a spiritual leader without seeking help from the spiritual leader himself! Tonight when I opened my Bible, I broke down in tears because my eyes were opened to my weaknesses. I have tried to be so strong without my source of strength. I can just picture God up in heaven saying to me, “Elissa, you do this every time…and you always come back in my arms exhausted because you tried be strong on your own… just let me carry you and stop worrying about what you can do, but let me worry about what I can do.” I usually picture a smile on His face when he says this, a little side note. He never fails me, I always fail him, but he is gracious and kind, and will let me fall so I can get back up and say, “God is my stronghold, a present help in time of trouble.”
Lately, like I was saying before, God has lead me to people who are really in need of a friend. I have gotten to pray, cry, and laugh with those who have been struggling. God has been using me (in my weakness) to reach out to these people. Three people have said they can open up their heart to me because they feel comfortable. That is not because I have done anything, but God who has allowed me to be a spiritual mentor. I feel he can use me to bring peace and tranquility to the hospital and those who come in and out each day. I pray that I will be an instrument of peace in what seems like a place full of disaster. I just need to remember these words when I am helping those in need “I planted, Apollos watered, but God caused it to grow. So neither the one who plants counts for anything, nor the one who waters, but God who causes the growth.” 1 Cor 3:6,7. I am just one person working with other people, but God is in this story. He has his hand on the hospital, and he will continue to grow all of us together spiritually.
This is what is on my mind tonight. I have many things to talk about in later blogs, but I want this entry to be one that when you read it, you will think of the hospital and the experiences that I have had here. I have lost sleep over these thoughts I’ve shared with you tonight. Continue to PRAY WITHOUT CEASING! God has been and is going to do amazing things here and I firmly believe that when we pray, our prayers are not unanswered. God bless us.

Some songs that we are singing in the Choir for the concert this weekend:
Chant en France:
Qu’it sont beaux sur les montagnes
Les pieds de ceui qui anonee
La paix la bonne nouvelle qui publie le salut.

Chant en Mafa:
Ndo madzahi tele veske nga tsukonri
A sam yesu Bi a sa van pambi na

A sa van pambi na
A san van woufe ndav

Chant en Fulfulde (I think):
Oh ta mbarou djoke sam baba
Nafinta ma yetsu ha yesu
Bone ma hukou donte ma fu ha
Yesu oh walete ronduggo nde

An baba a mouya le
Bana yesus an dada a mouya le
Ps. we are singing about 10-15 songs in total.
Posted by Elissa

All About The Hospital
I know that each blog I write, I share little experiences from both parts of my life here in Africa. My hospital life, and my non-hospital life. Since I don’t have a lot of time everyday to write about both, I usually just give everyone a sneak peak. In this entry, I want to share what has been going on in the hospital, and also what the Lord has been doing through the hospital workers.
I don’t know the medical terms for many things, but I will try to fill you in on the good stuff. Since we have had the Doctors here, we don’t have to send patients an hour away to get help when they can’t deliver the baby without a C-section. One woman came into the hospital that was pregnant. After examining her, the doctor concluded that her intestines were twisted, and they had to do surgery on her. They took her into surgery and after the C-section, they tried to work on her intestine. I wasn’t there because I was traveling to Maroua but from what I hear her intestine turned dark red. They finished without doing anything to the intestine. She is still in the hospital now. Ganava, the main nurse for maternity doesn’t think she will live. I’m hoping there is a miracle.
Speaking about C-sections, a side note, the doctors who are from the congo have never even delivered a baby yet so I am hoping and praying that they learn quick. It is a bitter/sweet feeling. Knowing they they haven’t delivered any babies means that I can teach them the things that I have been learning about deliveries. The only thing is that if any complications arise, I hope they know what to do in the situation.
Remember when I told you about the man who had Dengue Fever? Well, he was in so much shock that he passed away the next day. I remember talking to Kalda about his case and asked him why he died. Kalda told me that the family refused to treat him. I sometimes wonder why people bring their family members into the hospital when they don’t want to treat the disease. Dr. James told me one day after having a frustrating conversation with a women who was refusing treatment. He said “What do they expect us to do when they bring people to the hospital. Dance around them and chant, throwing dirt into the air and expect them to be healed?” I understand his point, but I am also American. The way people deal with problems here is very different. The Muslim women especially do not make decisions unless the man is around to make them.
I went to the hospital one day at night. I wanted to look in the ER for anyone who needed help. It seemed like Bouwa was holding everything together pretty well. A woman came in who was 9 months pregnant. She looked very agitated and tired. She was going to be admitted. I took her blood pressure and it was 150/90. In America that might not be deadly, but here no one has high blood pressure like that. I concluded that she had preclampsia. I went home to tell James about it so we all went to go help with a c-section. We were there for probably about an hour before she finally refused to be operated on. She said she needed to wait until her husband came to give the answer. We were all confused at how calm she was in this time of Emergency. When the husband finally did come to tell us what he wanted, he refused the operation as well. He said that the babies were too small to be born…she was 9 months pregnant. I don’t know what happened to her, but hopefully she got operated on soon after she left our hospital because she was in danger of death.
When I first arrived here at the hospital, there was a man who was diagnosed with TB. The hospital workers said that he had been there for quite awhile before my arrival. I checked him after I knew it wasn’t contagious anymore. He was so weak a frail. Not only that, but he was in pain and looked horrible. Slowly but surely we have been treating him. Everyday I have been seeing him come to worship in the mornings. Through the worships and nurses talking to him at his bedside these last few months, he has decided to give his life to Jesus! He got baptized last weekend. Avava was talking to me about it the other day and told me that he discovered something very important! He said, “I never knew that the hospital workers could be evangelists just like pastors! I am excited because now I know we have even more power because God is working through us!” I am forgetting his name at the moment, which is horrible because he knows my name but he looks 10 times better than he did when he first came here and he was healed?
When there is someone in the hospital who needs a transfusion, we get a person with the same blood type in the same day. There is none of this “storing” stuff going on. I love doing transfusions! When I come into the lab and there is someone sitting in the chair where we do transfusion, I get excited. Clara, the lab tech, always knows to get out of the way when there are transfusions patients and I am around. She understands how badly I want poke someone with a huge needle? every time someone comes into a lab for a transfusion, I talk them through the process. It is not the nicest way to tell them what is happening, but I try to make it amusing. I usually say in French, “Little poke right now (for HIV test)… Big poke later!:)” While I’m transfusing them, I ask them if they are tired. If they say no, I tell them “later!”…Lol I know it’s horrible, but it makes them laugh. I also tell those who are afraid not to look, or I just push their head to the side. It helps?
I have never seen worse cases of Hepatitis and Cirrhosis here. The people who come in are like balloons! Their stomachs are filled with fluid! We took care of a guy the other day who came in with the biggest stomach I have ever seen. We have been treating him, and thankfully it has been helping. He is doing much better than he was before.
The nurses and doctors have been doing a great job lately. I have been proud to say I work at the Koza Hospital. I know that we don’t have many supplies, but it is surprising how many things you can do with just a simple needle in this place. I’m amazed at how efficient they are with the products we are given. God continues to save lives and allow lives to be taken away. He has been at work in the lives of the patients and the workers here. Please keep us in your prayers as we try to heal those who come into the hospital each day. Thanks for listening! Until next time…
Posted by Elissa

Je Suis Content
I have spent the last hour trying to look for my recent blogs because its been so long since I’ve posted, I’ve forgotten where I have left off. If I repeat something, that’ll just be a reminder for you that it was just that important to me? A few weeks ago I was asked to do vespers for the church. Papa Sidi asked me on Monday so I could prepare for it Friday night. That whole week prior my stomach hurt because I was always aware of the fact that I was going to speak Friday night and being nervous makes me sick sometimes. I was sitting talking to one of my good friends in the hospital one day. When I noticed he wasn’t his usual happy self. I asked him what was wrong and he told me that he was a little upset because someone talked about him behind his back and he found out about it. We started getting into a conversation about living by example and it hit me… that was exactly what I needed to preach about! I thanked him for making me realize my sermon title. I feel like the hospital really needs to understand their potential in helping others if they merely live by example and stop blaming others for the problems that happen in our lives. Friday night finally came and I was ready. I wore a traditional African outfit so it would be even more epic when people came in. I felt a little out of place, but I am feeling more and more African everyday. When I got up to the pulpit to preach, before I said anything, someone interrupted and said they wanted the sermon to be translated in French AND mafa. … good thing Dr. James was there. I didn’t realize when I got up to the pulpit that my sermon was probably a little too short so I improvised at the end? God blessed and I think I got my point across well. Basically it was that we are the light of the world, God wants to use us to glorify him… what better way to do that then to live by example, showing how Christ has died for us and how our lives are forever changed as a result! So don’t blame and ridicule, but live by example.
There are many languages spoken here. Mafa, Fulfulde, Houssa, and French. Many other dialects as well. The hospital workers think its funny when they come up to me speaking another language and I don’t understand them… well I have started to learn a little Mafa now so I can communicate a LITTLE bit with everyone. I connect much better with the patients that way. Almost everyone who comes into the hospital speaks Mafa so I get my share of practice.
The other day a man came into the hospital at night. Cailtin and I happen to be there when he walked into the emergency room. He was badly bleeding from his nose… in fact his nose was almost completely off his face. He was in a bad moto accident. We had our camera on hand, thank goodness, so Cailtin took some gnarly pictures. He was happy to pose for us as well. It was like he wasn’t even in any pain… these Africans know how be strong! He was also missing an arm (not from the accident) so we took pictures with it too. He was laughing and joking with us, sticking his arm nub in our faces… it was amusing.
So I think I have successfully broken all there is to break in our bathroom. When I first arrived here, one day I was in the shower. A mosquito was flying around, and I immediately was alert and was sure it wouldn’t come close to me without me killing it. It landed on the wall and I tried to kill it immediately… I ended up hitting the mirror on the wall as well and it fell off the wall shattering on the floor…Accident number one. The second thing I broke was the light. I was trying to fix it and didn’t realize that I hadn’t turned the light switch off (the are opposite here). I put my finger close to the socket and it electrified me. Obviously anything that was in my hand was going to fall, and sure enough the light shattered as well… I promise I won’t break anything more since there is nothing more to break.
I have been here for 3 months now and I have just recently gotten over my second malaria episode. I honestly thought that I was just exhausted from work because I had worked hard the whole two weeks that Dr. James was here. Avava came to my house Saturday night and told me to get a malaria test. I was pretty sure I didn’t have malaria so I said babyishly, “No way, it hurts me when they poke my finger?”. Dr. James started telling me that he doesn’t remember how many times missionaries have denied having malaria and the tests results proved them wrong. I was sure about this one… but he said I was in denial. Sure enough, the next day I went to the hospital, I was forced to have a malaria test, and it was 10,300. High. It was a blessing and a curse because I finally got to have a little time in the morning to rest, but I also didn’t want to be chained to the bed all day. I am feeling great now! I also took a Typhoid test and it came up positive as well. I never treated it, so I don’t think that I ever had it in the first place.
Something really exciting happened last weekend. The night before Sabbath I saw people cleaning out the baptistery. Since I live right next to the church, it’s hard for me to go to the hospital without saying hi to everyone that is in my path (I can’t run away? lol). They were preparing for people to get baptized (obviously)! Sabbath came along, and the church was completely packed! I sang with the choir group and played guitar. After church everyone went outside to see the baptisms. It was a wonderful Sabbath. We danced and sang for a long time! 80 people were baptized! I pray for those who got baptized to be filled with the Holy Spirit.
Caitlin and I did the 12 days of Christmas to our friend Clara. We failed the first time we tried because she came out with a flashlight and saw us running away. We acted stupid and never told her it was us, even though it was extremely obvious. No one would do the 12 days of Christmas here because Seventh-day Adventist DON’T CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS… I know, shocking. Also, no one would give her a cake like we did. Super American! The last day, we knocked on her door, opening the door, we sang to her “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” Love it. She thanked us over and over… We had so much fun in the process
It has been pretty crazy this last week. Since it was Caitlin’s last week, we were inspired to do all the things we said we would do before she left. Sleep outside under the stars, sleep at Zara’s house, climb a mountain, Meet Avava’s fiancé, and ride a donkey. We successfully accomplished those things in one week. One night we brought my little mosquito net outside and slept under the stars…epic. The second night, we slept at Zara’s house. Surprisingly we were more comfortable at Zara’s house then we were sleeping outside our own house. They treat American’s like royalty! I slept right next to Zara and I felt so protected! That Sabbath we went with Bahana to a mountain. It was an amazing experience except for the fact that we almost died! Bahana is a crazy motorcycle driver. We almost ran into a bike rider once, and another time we hit a pothole that he didn’t see and I almost bounced right off… praise God I was holding on tight. We worked so hard to get up to the top of the mountain that the view looked even more amazing. We took 300 pictures that day. When we went to Maroua we met Avava’s fiancé. She is my age! She is still technically in high school, but it is a different system here. We visit her at her school. She is perfect for Avava. While we were waiting for Avava to say goodbye to his love, Cailtin and I were sitting in the car. We had talked earlier that it wasn’t possible to ride a donkey unless there was one randomly in Maroua. Sure enough, a few minutes later a man on a donkey came riding up. I knew he didn’t speak English, but I asked him if I could ride it, looking ridiculous as I motioned “riding a donkey” to him. Finally we got the chance, in the meantime gathering quite a crowd. I bet everybody was whispering to each other in French “Nanzara…” (White person—don’t know how to spell it).
There are just a few fun facts/things that I want to mention before I leave because there is just so much that I can’t write it all out in one blog at this point. I talked to the pastor the other day when we were coming back from Maroua. I asked him how many churches he pastured. He said 32!!! I am already proud of my Father for keeping up one church! 32 is a little much don’t you think?
I was doing rounds with the doctor the other day. He brought me to this one patient and after talking for more than five minutes; he nonchalantly told me that the patient had TB and was admitted yesterday (doesn’t he know that it is contagious?). I quickly tried to explain to him my fear of TB and then left the room immediately. They don’t necessarily take precautions for those kinds of things.
Today when I woke up, I realized that Avava had bought me some apples from the market in Maroua. It was my first apple I have had since I’ve been in Africa… truly heavenly.
The baby that I wash everyday left because he is a healthy child now. I pray he will continue to be well taken care of. I have had so much to do every night since Caitlin has left so I went to bed at 2 am last night. I am trying to keep my eyes open during the day. I am planning on spending Christmas in Koza. It was not my first option, but I think I’m going to be able to give gifts to people who are not as fortunate as me. I just received three huge packages. One from my mother and the other two from Joanna Miracle! Thank you thank you so much church for all of your support! I continue to keep you in my prayers, always giving thanks to God.
The choir is practicing every day until January 1 for a big concert. It is killing me, but I am the guitar player and one of the main leaders. Also, the church is having a week of prayer. This means when our choir starts practice at 3:30 I don’t get to go home until around 7:30 pm… God keep me patient. I’m tired
During worship at the church tonight I was flipping through my notebook. I found a poem I wrote before coming to Africa. I remember writing one day in summer school when the teacher was boring me. I had so many thoughts going through my head about coming here, so I just picked up my pen and wrote what I was thinking, and this is what came out. It’s called “My Stream on Consciousness”
Take me to a place in need
Where I will grow spiritually
Giving you each day and hour
Please fill me with your power

I pray that I would be to them
Like you when you made your decent
I’m only human; I make mistakes
Holy Spirit consume me to change my ways

So I turn to you today
Refine and mold me like clay
Prepare me for this journey somehow
Only you can carry me through now

I approach your throne of grace
With boldness I am in this place
Be with me and show me mercy
As I help to lead the thirsty
God has answered my prayer. He has given me mercy grace and power!
Ps. Arielle, Cecil’s baby boy is about a year old now. He successfully said my name the other day. Audrey is Zara’s little child. He is about 4 years old and he is learning English from me. Now when I come to the house I ask him “Audrey, how are you?”. He slowly says “I…a..am..ffiin…ee. Thank…you”. He knows it though?
Posted by Elissa